HELPING YOUR CHILD HANDLE BULLYING

  • Advise your child to leave expensive toys, sports equipment and money at home.
  • Encourage your child to play near a group or with a group
  • Encourage your child to visualize themselves making friends and staying in charge of their behaviour.
  • Encourage and model confident body language
  • Suggest your child play near the teacher on yard duty or in view of the staff room.
  • Encourage your child to use positive self-talk statements
  • Teach and model assertiveness strategies
  • Encourage communication at home
  • Encourage your child to use humour
  • Ask your child if they would like  you to pick them up or meet them at their classroom.
  • Talk to your child about being in the right place at the right time.
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SIGNS OF BULLYING

  • Torn clothing
  • loss of money
  • physical injury such as bruising
  • truancy
  • bed wetting
  • moody outburts
  • unwillingness to attend school
  • withdrawn behaviour
  • refusing to participate in extra curricular activities
  • over or under eating
  • damaged property

Take Action Against Bullying

                          THE TELLING PLAN

WHO TO TELL?

Friends

Parents

Teacher

Kids Helpline

WHEN TO TELL?

After school

When teacher is alone

Private Time

WHAT TO TELL

How often does it happen

Who is involved?

What do they do?

How you feel about it?

HOW TO TELL

Write a letter/email

take a friend

do a drawing

write a poem

Ask a parent or friend to tell.

Twelve Tips for a Deeper Sleep

Find yourself staring at the ceiling? Listen up!

Bright lights stimulate wakefulness. Use dim lighting as bedtime approaches, and if you have to get up in the night use a flashlight or low-wattage light.Simiarly, use low light if you are reading in bed.

Any new smell, even one associated with relaxation, like lavender can make you more alert. You’re better off with a scent that makes you feel safe and comfortable. There really is something to be said for cuddling up with your spouse’s undershirt. 

You don’t need an expensive mattress or one with space age bells and whistles. There is only one good study on mattresses and it confirmed the Goldilocks theory. most people prefer a mattress that’s not too hard or too soft.

A lot of people take bedtime pain relievers that contain caffeine and don’t even realize it. Excedrin has 65 mg of caffeine per tablet. if you take two there is as much as a cup of coffee. Check the label.

A lot of dogs are very sensitive to noises outside, like other dogs barking or neighbours coming home late. A white –  noise machine or fan will drown out the noises, that are keeping your pet up, which will keep your pet from waking you.

One of the biggest disrupters of sleep is the pulling and tugging of sheets and blankets. I tell couples that each person should have their own.

For a man, how he slept the night before predicts that quality of his interactions with his spouse the next day. For a woman, how she interacted with her spouse that day affects how she will sleep that night.

Keep computer, TV’s and other gadgets out of the bedroom. They’re distracting and the blue light emitted from screens and monitors will disrupt melatonin production and interfere with sleep.

If you have allergies, you’re probably better off with a feather pillow which is more likely to be encased in tightly woven fabric which keeps dist mites out. Relatively few people are allergic to feathers whereas foam can exacerbate allergies because of its moisture content.

camomile tea is gently relaxing safe even for children. Skull cap, california poppy and valerian are stronger for true insomnia. There is a pharmacy in your backyard.

Try soaking your feet in cold water, perhaps with some epsom salts or bath oils. Dry  your feet vigorously with a towel and give them a massage. This will stimulate the 72,000 nerve endings in your feet and help your nervous system.

If the breath is calm so goes the mind. While lying in bed, try practising a relaxing breathe ratio for two mins inhale for four seconds, exhale for four seconds and repeat.

Found in the Readers digest pages 54 and 55

Specifiying Your Problem Situation

taken from the Anxiety and Phobia Book

On a separate sheet of paper write   two or three of your own problem situations. Be sure to specify the Who, When, What, How and Fear and the Goal. If possible choose situations that are current for you right now. Begin with a situation that’s not very uncomfortable or overwhelming.

Developing an Assertive Response

Now that you have defined your problem situations, the next step is to develop an assertive response for each one. For the purposes of learning assertiveness skills a response can be broken down into six steps (adapted from Bowers Work)

1. Evaluate your rights within the situation at hand.

2. Designate a time for discussing what you want.

3. Addressing the main person involved, state the problem in terms of its consequences to you.

4. Express your feelings about the particular situation

5. Make your request for changing the situation

6.Tell this person the consequences of gaining or not gaining their co-operation.

 

Dealing With Anger

1. List circumstances in which you get hooked into someone else’s anger.

2. what can you do instead of getting angry:

 

 

3. Describe an event that you are still angry about.

 

 

 

4. List 2 things you can do instead of your current anger action.

Changes in your thoughts

 

Changes in your behaviour

 

 

5. How will these new methods affect others?

 

 

6. How will these new methods affect you?

Tips on Expressing Anger

Anger can be expressed in many constructive, creative and safe ways. Here is a list of ways that you can express your anger.

Have fun adding to the list.

1. Write a letter to your abuser or others that have made you angry.

2. Take a self defense course such as Wen-Do, Tai Chi, karate

3. Make a special pillow that you can pound when you are angry. Draw or paint a face of  your abuser on the pillow.

4. Take up aerobics and imagine punching or kicking your abuser.

5. Pound the bed with a swim noodle or a tennis racket

6.Go to a therapist who specializes in trauma counselling

7. Organize a political rally opposing violence against women.

8. Make up a fantasy about what you could do to the person that made you angry. Write it down.

9.

10.